911 on speed dial

I don’t want to alarm you or worry you unnecessarily but I feel like with as much as I’ve shared in the past, you deserve to know about my current health crisis.

I have a cold.

I’m sorry I had to just blurt it out like that but I’m not sure how it’ll turn out. It might be fatal. Or not. 

The thing is, I haven’t had one in years and am a bit unfamiliar with how they go. Beyond the examples set for me by my husband and children, of course.

I don’t think it’s anything quite as serious as a man cold and I don’t feel the need to wipe my nose on everything like the kids do, so it still could turn out ok.

I do, however, have a scratchy throat, headache, earache and I’ve lost my voice. Oh and I’ve sneezed a few times. Is this the beginning of the end?

That’s pretty much how it started with SG during his last cold but there may also have been moaning and some bizarre uncontrolled shivering.

I also seem to remember some sort of strange honking/coughing/gagging noise going on but so far I’ve managed to avoid that. Honestly, I don’t know how the hell he made that noise and am pretty sure I couldn’t repeat it if I tried.

I suspect he had some sort of inner demon that was magically exorcised when he sneezed so hard he flung himself across the room.

Luckily, we were blessed with a miracle and he made a full recovery.

But can we really expect another miracle of that caliber in the same household? Is it too much to ask?

Again, I don’t know how this is going to turn out but from what I’ve witnessed with other people and their colds, it’s going to be much worse than any of the “cut me in half and dig around for a few hours” type surgeries I’ve had.

Wish me luck!

If I start to go downhill, I’ll post my will tomorrow. Let me know if I have anything you want.