She sleeps

In her dream she laughs.

She crosses the street and catches a glimpse of her long hair in the window and she’s surprised. She doesn’t know why but she runs her hand through the length of it and smiles.

She doesn’t understand why it surprises her but it does. Something feels different but she’s happy as she feels the weight of the long hair on her shoulders and the warmth of it on her neck.

She knows she’s never been pretty but today she feels like she is. She laughs easily.

She looks at the people she loves and her smile is reflected back at her in the eyes and smiles of her husband and children.

She has energy and feels great! She is the wife and mother they deserve. They laugh as easily as she does. Genuine, from the soul, kind of laughter.

Her dream changes from the city to  the mountains, to the beach, to a meadow but all the while she can can feel her hair. She brushes it out of her face in the wind. Ties it up in the water. It shines in the sun and moves in the breeze, comforting her in a way she doesn’t understand.

In this world she doesn’t know the word cancer. She doesn’t have the telltale scar that reminds her should she forget.

There is only laughter and everywhere she goes there is sunshine and people who love her.  She welcomes the feeling of pure joy.

There are no dark clouds, only blue sky.  No meds, only margaritas.

She is happy.

She wakes up and runs her hand through her short curls. The dream vanishes and almost instantly she remembers. It all comes crashing back and her heart skips a beat as she catches her breath.

He hears her and reaches for her, tells her it’s early and to go back to sleep. As she curls up with him a tear falls on his chest and he runs a hand through her curls. He kisses the top of her head and holds her tighter.

He knows.

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