MWF looking for one slightly used mind to replace one which has recently been lost. Would prefer one which will NOT do any of the following:
- Offer to take her oldest daughter to the midnight showing of Harry Potter on a school night.
- Suggest she bring a friend or two – and offer to pay for them all.
- Say things like “Do you think we need to get in line at 10:30 or 11:00?”
- Plan the taking of medication so as not to miss any of the good parts will making trips to the bathroom.
A shiny new model is not necessary as the previous mind was neither clear nor operating at full speed. Minimum functioning levels are desired and the ability to multi-task is non-negotiable.
Please email applicant with best price and photos of a well rested current owner to confirm the new mind is NOT stupid enough to stay up all night with middle schoolers.