Out of practice

Well wow – I have a chance to write this morning. Two of my girls are at a sleepover, one is at speed & strength camp – a conditioning camp for athletes – and SG is at work. The big dog is asleep in her bed and the little one is crunching loudly on her food.

There is nothing I have to do right now except drink my coffee and type. Funny thing though, I’m not sure what to say.

This summer has been the busiest one yet. I always thought once the girls got older, they’d need me a little less and would just sort of overnight, have the ability to entertain themselves. Hmmmm, that kind of didn’t happen.  Instead the number of rides they need to places has increased exponentially.

I suspect that’s so I’ll actually look forward to D1 taking driver’s ed? So I’ll put all that stress aside and say “Yay, your sister will drop you off at soccer camp.”

Speaking of camp, D3 just finished up a week with the UK Elite soccer coaches. Funny how young guys with Scottish accents made her sisters suddenly want to go with me to pick her everyday. Even the 10 yr old.

Also funny how it was the only camp where the moms showed up bright and early well dressed with fresh combed hair and make-up. Usually the moms, at least at drop off in the summer, tend  more towards the hats, sunglasses and all natural look.

Not so much when our children are greeted with a rich Scottish brogue.

The nannies were also not immune. I overheard one young girl tell Coach Ross that she was “just the babysitter” several times within a span of a few minutes. What is it about a man with an accent? Sorry SG. Your southern thing is cute too.

Our girls are also asking if maybe dad could do a year sabbatical in Scotland? “Please mom?!” Even the oldest is willing to give up a year of high school to travel. This is the girl who moved so many times when she was little that the sight of a U-Haul makes her break out in hives.

Times, they are a changin’. I blame boys.

Hmm, looks like maybe I found something to say after all. Sorry it’s neither brilliant nor witty but I’m a little out of practice.

Oh and by the way, the dogs love each other! Good news right? The bad news? The puppy discovered the hamster. So far it’s safely in it’s cage but that could change.

ps. Thanks for all the nice comments on the dream post. I meant to reply to all of you but I think I was in a bit of a mood. Shocking right? Anyway, thanks!


She sleeps

In her dream she laughs.

She crosses the street and catches a glimpse of her long hair in the window and she’s surprised. She doesn’t know why but she runs her hand through the length of it and smiles.

She doesn’t understand why it surprises her but it does. Something feels different but she’s happy as she feels the weight of the long hair on her shoulders and the warmth of it on her neck.

She knows she’s never been pretty but today she feels like she is. She laughs easily.

She looks at the people she loves and her smile is reflected back at her in the eyes and smiles of her husband and children.

She has energy and feels great! She is the wife and mother they deserve. They laugh as easily as she does. Genuine, from the soul, kind of laughter.

Her dream changes from the city to  the mountains, to the beach, to a meadow but all the while she can can feel her hair. She brushes it out of her face in the wind. Ties it up in the water. It shines in the sun and moves in the breeze, comforting her in a way she doesn’t understand.

In this world she doesn’t know the word cancer. She doesn’t have the telltale scar that reminds her should she forget.

There is only laughter and everywhere she goes there is sunshine and people who love her.  She welcomes the feeling of pure joy.

There are no dark clouds, only blue sky.  No meds, only margaritas.

She is happy.

She wakes up and runs her hand through her short curls. The dream vanishes and almost instantly she remembers. It all comes crashing back and her heart skips a beat as she catches her breath.

He hears her and reaches for her, tells her it’s early and to go back to sleep. As she curls up with him a tear falls on his chest and he runs a hand through her curls. He kisses the top of her head and holds her tighter.

He knows.